Counselling deals with thoughts, feelings and behaviour, when one or more of them get in the way of functioning at your best, and/or lead to suffering.

For an individual, problematic thoughts might be something like:

“I’ll never be happy and successful.  What’s the point of even trying?”
“What if I try to make friends, and get rejected?  I don’t think I could stand that.”
“I feel like a loser; so I must be one.”

Psychologists call thoughts like these “thinking traps” or “cognitive distortions.”  Everyone occasionally thinks in these ways.  When they happen a lot, these problematic thinking patterns can really trip us up. Click here to learn more about cognitive distortions.

Feelings include both emotions, and the various sensations our physical bodies feel.  Feelings are not good or bad on their own.  However, some of them can be very difficult to deal with.  For example:

Grief
Despair
Pain
Rage
Hurt
Shame
Anxiety

Most of us can think of situations in which we did or said something unusual — even regrettable — trying to get away from awful feelings, or reduce their intensity.  When that happens a lot, it can get in the way of living life.

Behaviour is literally anything we do.  People might seek counselling when behaviour consistently leads to negative consequences, and keeps happening anyway.  For example:

Impulsively trying risky things for thrill or pleasure; even though it results in troubles, such as debt, hurt feelings for friends and family, or even injury.
“Losing it,” and saying or doing things you later regret.
Alcohol abuse, or various other forms of addiction.

Obviously, one or two incidents of behaviour which leads to trouble may just be a normal matter of making mistakes.  Everyone makes them.  However, when behaviour continues, despite resulting hardships — and especially when attempts have been made to reduce or stop the behaviour, yet it keeps happening — counselling may be a reasonable consideration.

If thoughts, feelings or behaviour contribute to troubles in your life; call Chris at (226) 932-7111 to discuss how he can help.